Feel... Feel what?

January 30th, more and more people check out of Julius Raab Heim, never to return again. It is starting to feel sad. 

There was a large party last night, called "Feel's Anatomy". The "Feel"concept includes hot parties in Linz and outside Austria, arranged by ambitious (oh well....) students that obviously make a lot of money each time people decide to attend their parties, pimple booze and shake their asses to the pumping tunes that the DJ's produce. I have never seen so many fliers for a student party. And I have never seen even more fliers handed out AT the party for the coming one.

The theme of last night's party was (as mentioned earlier) "Feel's Anatomy", taken from the tv show "Grey's Anatomy". Most people were dressed out to doctors, naughty nurses, general douchebags looking to get laid or metropolitan cruisers sipping Vodka Redbull in plastic cups. It was a great party!

Tonight it is a birthday party in the dorm. More are leaving tomorrow and just an hour ago, I bid my Brazilian neighbor farewell as he was heading back to Rio de Janeiro (if I'm not mistaking). This will be another "last chance" event. I hope it will be epic.

Thank you for reading.

More winter

It keeps snowing and snowing, and despite my wish for warmer weather, I can't stop to think that it is beautiful. This is the first time I enjoy the view outside my window.

Winter is not over yet

This winter must be one of the coldest ones I have experienced. I cannot remember last time it was this cold.

The semester is more or less over. I have one exam left on Tuesday and then one month of freedom begins. I had an exam in global management and strategy yesterday and I managed to hand in my last paper for the semester last night, and I can feel a great feeling of relief. Many friends are leaving Austria these days and I will most likely not see some of them ever again. It is going to feel so strange and empty in one way, but it will at the same time feel good to come back and begin the second semester.

It's in the middle of the winter right now, but I have heard that Austria is beautiful in the spring.

[Jänner] (= January)

It's (almost) late January and the semester is almost over. I have two large exams, one minor exam and one deadline left before the semester break in February.

It is interesting that I after a week and a half back in Austria feel as if I never left the place at all. As the semester is reaching its end, a lot of people pack their bags to leave the country. Some to return soon for the second semester, while some are rounding up their studies at Johannes Kepler University. It's sad in a way when people you have got used to leave. You know deep inside that the chances of seeing some of your friends again are minimal, almost non-existent. It's sad, but at the same time something normal and typical in life.

It's Wednesday and I have to finish my last big paper for this semester within the coming 48 hours. Time to leave and be a little more productive.

Thank you for reading.

A message from the opposition

Reaching the end

It is slowly getting time for me to return back to Austria after a little more than three weeks in Sweden again. It has done me well to see my family and a limited number of my friends again. It has done me well to come back home and sleep in my own bed, drink my coffee out of my own cup and take a shower in my own shower. I know the streets, I know the language and I know my life in Sweden pretty well by now. I have not had to live like a stranger like I did during the three months in Austria. However, despite my happiness about being back home, I am happy about returning to Austria. I am happy about returning to my girlfriend, to my friends and to my studies. I am returning back to Sweden shortly, so as soon as I start feeling homesick I'll already be sitting on a plane back home again. No worries in other words. It's only three weeks left of the semester. There are a few parties left to attend, a prom and possibly one major football game. 2010 has just begun!

New chapter

It's Sunday (boooooring) and one week left before my departure back to Austria for the last three weeks of the winter semester of 2009/2010.

Like I have mentioned in previous posts, 2009 passed very quickly. It is surreal that the second decade of this century (and millennium) just began.
2010 will hopefuly be a better year than 2009. I will hopefully not have to fight for my life much more. I will hopefully be surrounded by people that I enjoy being around.

2010 will maybe be everything that 2009 failed to be. Maybe. In a global perspective, 2010 will perhaps be a year like all other. I find it very hard to believe that world peace will prevail during this year. I find it hard to believe that major conflicts will be solved during the coming twelve months. Even if the world might improve its financial condition after the recent financial crisis, I seriously don't think that this year will be recorded in the books of history as a unique time period. Maybe I'm being cynical, or maybe I'm just being realistic.

I seriously don't think that the polarization and confrontation(s) in the world will decrease or stagnate during this year, I simply think that we haven't seen the end of certain things yet. There have been some common trends in Europe the past few years and I think that these trends will continue and develop further. For instance, I don't think we've seen the end of right extremism yet, and I don't think that we've seen the end of religious fanaticism yet either. Facebook groups against refugees are popping up like mushrooms, political parties reveal their politically "incorrect" agendas and surprisingly, the number of people embracing these agendas seem to increase day by day. It's sad to see this development and it's sad to see how fear and phobia is marking the European continent. Maybe I'm being cynical, or maybe I'm just being realistic.

In a more individual and private perspective I see the new year as normal with some exceptions. I am pretty convinced that this year will not be a year when old friends return and relations are retained. Everybody is simply too busy for such nonsense. This will be a year like all other, when we take each other (and each others' existence) for granted. We procrastinate and neglect instead of embracing and respect. Maybe I'm being cynical, or maybe I'm just being realistic.

In six months it has passed four years since I graduated from high school. So many things have happened during these four years. It feels more like eight years than four. I have met so many people from different parts of the world. I have changed enormously as an individual during these four years, and I feel more estranged and alienated with myself and my previous "me" than ever. Not only with myself but also with most of the people I used to know. When something significant takes place in your life, something that changes your life either to better or worse, you find yourself relating to yourself and your life in terms of "before" and "after" this change. My rear view mirror is still very large, not much time has passed since I had my significant experience that divided my life into two testaments. The old testament is a closed chapter, it's a chapter with a lot of people that I intend to keep there. I don't want to waste anymore time consciously on people that are not worth it. I want to spend my time with those that really mean something to me, especially those who stood by me when I went through the most difficult time of my life. Maybe I'm being unfair, maybe I'm being harsh, maybe I'm being cynical, or maybe I'm just being realistic.

Day one of decade two

It's the first day of the new year and the new decade. It is so strange to look back at the time since the year 2000 as a whole decade. I rememer how I celebrated New Years Eve back 1999. It was such a massive hype about the new millenium and the possible digital breakdowns that would follow because of it. Ten years have now passed and a new decade begins.

I was unfortunately not able to spend New Years Eve with my wonderful little Nicole, but I am happy about seeing her soon again. The evening ended with illness and fever for me, and all I can hope for is that the rest of 2010 will not be charactarized by poor health. Having experienced the most challenging and difficult time of my life, I am optimistic about moving on with health, longevity and around the people I love.

2010 has the potential to be the best year of my life, and I will do anything I can to make come true.